The finger episode

One warm Wed afternoon, Clutzy drove to her suburban home with a trunk full of paint and supplies. Happy to share her joy with her family friends, she decides to grab her camera to take a picture of all the stuff for her first painting blog post. In a rush to pull out all of the big, heavy 5 gallon buckets of paint, she starts to empty out the two small boxes containing 4 smaller gallon paint buckets. With a row of about 7 gallons of smaller paint buckets resting on her trunk edge, she grabs the camera for the arranged picture. A crash happens before the flash, and light tan paint slowly pours onto the garage floor, Clutzy's shoes, and pants. In a quick second, she grabs a cup off the garage shelf and begins to scoop the paint on the floor back into the empty gallon bucket that was now standing on its side. She yells to her 3 young children who are racing down the street on their scooters to come back and grab a cup. In a haste, she begins to scoop the paint up with her arms and hands so avoid the paint draining out into the driveway as well as the garage floor....

After about 2 minutes of scooping and panting, most of the paint makes it back into the gallon bucket. She asks her eldest son to run around back and grab the hose to begin working on the garage floor mess. While he walks around back, she runs into the house still dripping with paint on her pants, arms, hands and shoes to begin stripping and cleaning off. In all the chaos, she forgets to take her shoes off and runs up the stairs leaving a nice foot trail behind her to the kitchen. Once her arms and hands are all cleaned off in the kitchen, she notices the trail on her way back to the stairs. That is when the shoes came off and Operation Clean Carpet began. She grabs some awesome carpet cleaner and a wet rag and works her way through the family room and down the stairs leaving nothing but clean unnoticeable carpet behind her. Once downstairs, she notices her eldest, and usually very obedient son, trying to spray the garage floor with the above hose mentioned above. She rushes out the big, heavy garage door back into the garage slamming the door behind her and then yells out "OOOOOOOOOOCHHH!!"

A moment of silence occurs at that moment and everyone just freezes staring at Clutzy who is now holding back tears from hers eyes, grabbing her hand and jumping up and down. Once the shock goes away, she removes her clutched fingers around her middle finger to find a very black and blue finger nail along with an enlarged finger that was turning a bright shade of red. She runs back up the clean stairs and grabs an ice pack and continues to watch the finger throb and grow. She is unable to bend her finger at this point. Her cell phone rings and she thinks about answering it and continues to sit there in agony. After about 5 minutes, she goes down the stairs and proceeds to clean the garage floor before the paint can dry on the floor, uttering a few small words under her breathe while she walks. Once the floor is cleaned up, the kids continue to play while Clutzy returns the phone call she received during her 40 minutes of chaos. 4 Advil later and about 15 minutes later, Clutzy's hubby returned home from work and school. She complained for about 15 minutes to him and then proceeded with her original plan - she took the picture and began to paint with her good working right hand. Here is the result of the finger episode...part two of the story to be continued and called "The lady in KC flipping everyone off all of the time!"

Comments

Oh D!! I am really trying to hold back the laughter in all of this. I am so sorry that you smashed your finger. As I was reading your story I am trying to imagine your kids running around, your screaming and running in the house, the phone ringing. I typical crazy day at that Hanson's!! Minus the finger incident. I hope it feels better soon.
A said…
i'm totally cracking up right now!!!

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